August: Giving Myself What I Haven't Earned Yet
Updated: Oct 9
As promised, I'm back with you at the end of this new month to tell you how I personally experienced this exercise of resting without having earned it, and more broadly, this month of August 2026.
If July was the month I started becoming the woman I wanted to be again, August was the month I learned to give myself more time, more attention, more rest... before feeling I had truly earned it.
Resting Before I've Done Everything
Last week, just a few days before the end of the month, I was still far from checking every box on my August list. The old me would simply have said out loud: I don't deserve this break yet. And yet, I gave myself a weekend, somewhere new, a few miles from Paris.
Not so long ago, I only let myself rest once everything was done, even if it meant finishing exhausted. Now I rest as soon as I feel the first signs of tiredness, sometimes even before, just for the pleasure of it.
Because I'm a human being. Not a phone battery. Not a gas tank.
Because I don't need to empty myself completely to justify stopping regularly to refuel my energy.
And for me, it's a much bigger change than it looks.
Noticing What Calms Me
In August, I also practiced noticing what, around me, truly soothes my body or my mind, rather than what impresses or excites it.
I stopped looking only for interesting or stimulating people. I took the time to notice the ones who make me feel lighter, calmer. The ones I can talk to freely, laugh with, take my time with, without having to be another version of myself. A version that protects itself or performs.
I already knew I didn't have to be strong all the time. But I was afraid that showing my vulnerability would make me lose my value in some people's eyes.
The right circle proves that belief wrong. What beautiful progress!
Of course, I still sometimes doubt what my body feels, and I still hesitate before fully welcoming lightness. But I notice it faster than before, and I can correct course with the right thoughts and the right actions.
Gentleness Is a Practice, Not Just an Idea
In this eighth month of the year, gentleness (finally) stopped being an intention and became a real, recurring habit.
There was that evening when, struck by an inexplicable and uncontrollable anxiety, I had to combine listening to music at therapeutic frequencies with picking up a manual activity again (an old crochet project) just to stop... thinking.
Apparently, my body and my brain needed to step out of “active production” mode and just wanted to be present in the moment.
I just wanted to be. To exist without proving anything.
Giving Myself Grace: What I'm Carrying Into September
If I had to sum up August in one sentence, it would be: giving yourself what you haven't earned yet.
Giving myself rest. Giving myself creation. Giving myself slowness. Giving myself the right to be happy before accomplishing anything.
Without worrying about whether I already deserve it because my past is already full of proof, or whether I will deserve it someday because my future is already building new proof.
A gentle life, it turns out, isn't built by waiting for everything to be perfect. It's built by making decisions, starting today, that reflect the person we deliberately choose to become.
So for my next journaling session, I'll open my notebook to answer this question, and I invite you to do the same:
What am I giving myself today, without waiting to have earned it?
The EstellyHappy Happiness Journal will keep me company during this exercise, in the morning or the night before. It's available in the shop.
I'll meet you again in September for a new exercise.
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And to start your own evening ritual, the EstellyHappy Happiness Journal is waiting for you in the shop.
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