April: In April, reconnecting with my body stayed an intention. What I learned anyway — and how journaling helped me listen.
- May 1
- 3 min read
Reconnecting With My Body: An Intention, But Not Yet a Reality
When I wrote "reconnecting with my body" as my theme for April, I had a clear image in mind. Gentle mornings. Regular walks. A body finally treated as an ally rather than a productivity tool.
Reality looked different.
March had already been a demanding month. An unexpected professional setback had slowed me down, and then I had to catch up on my personal program while continuing to move forward on the projects closest to my heart: relaunching my EstellyHappy shop and growing my ghostwriting practice. April inherited all of that.
The walks I had planned to start again? Pushed to May.
But I refused to see that as a failure. More like a postponed appointment — and without the guilt.
What My Body Was Telling Me
Some mornings I woke up with a stiff neck, knotted shoulders, a fatigue that wouldn't lift even after a full night's sleep. My body had been speaking to me for a while. But stubborn Me wasn't really listening.
The gym had gradually disappeared from my schedule, then from my life altogether — it even closed. Sleep had shifted later and, more importantly, gotten shorter. Food, sometimes neglected under the pretense of having no time or appetite. And through all of it, work kept going.
I'm not sharing this to complain or to blame myself. I'm sharing it because I think many of us live this way. We put our bodies on hold, telling ourselves we'll get to it once things calm down. Except things don't calm down on their own. They just don't.
Reconnecting With My Body: Reconciliation Is Underway
What April taught me most is that my body sends signals well before the red alert. A jaw that clenches. Breath that shortens. The urge to stop going out. These are acts of self-love. Not signs of weakness. Certainly not punishments.
Learning to recognize them, accept them, and listen to them is a form of self-knowledge. And journaling helped me here too. Writing down how I feel physically — without judgment — allowed me to see my unconscious behavioral patterns. To understand that certain overloaded weeks leave traces that the body quietly keeps track of.
That's not nothing. And it deserves our attention.
Journaling to Go Further
If you too feel like you're not quite inhabiting your body right now — like you're more in your head than in your skin — I invite you to try this.
In the evening, before sleep, open your notebook and write just three lines:
How did my body feel today? What did it ask of me? Did I respond?
Not to analyze. Just to listen. That's often where everything begins.
The EstellyHappy Happiness Journal is the notebook I use for this kind of dialogue with myself. It's available in the EstellyHappy shop.
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